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Everyone is familiar with the sales gimmicks such as “Buy one Get One for 50% Off”, or “Buy Two and Get the Third Free”, or the most common sucker come-on, “Buy One Get One Free”, but I think I have found the “Ultimate” sale.

Every week I, and thousands (maybe millions) of other people, get an envelope in the mail called “Valpak” and it is full of several individual sales coupons.  Very seldom do I find any-thing that interests me, personally, and some times I  throw it away without opening, but some times I’m bored and patiently go through and look at each add.  This week I was bored I guess, or maybe hopeful, because I looked at each ad on both sides.  Sometimes one sheet will have two different companies ads on a side.  My diligence paid off.  I found the ultimate “Buy One Get One Free” ad.  It was for “BOGOF PLASTIC SURGERY”.  Dr. U. Bogof M.D.  (the Dr’s. name is fictitious) The ad offers people who buy a procedure at regular price, can get a second procedure of equal or lesser value for FREE.  There was a list of procedures eligible for this offer;some of which follow:

Facelift,  Rhinoplasty,  Liposuction,  Dermal Fat Grafting,  Breast Lift,  Breast Reduction (leave ’em be),  Breast Augmentation (shades of Dolly),  and my favorite the Brazilian Butt Lift.  I’ve seen a lot of ladies out there who could use this and I’ve seen a lot of ladies who needed the reverse…………..Now, take a good, long look at this list.  The choices and combination possibilities are endless………One cheek and a breast,  a nose and a lipo. a reduction and lift at the same time, a fat lip and a fat boob, and on and on and on……. Have fun ladies.

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I have to go now.  My plane leaves for Brazil in an hour…….